♥ Friday, February 22, 2008
Screwed Up!
Funny that I'm always screaming for attention when I don't do that when it's really necessary. Someone just raised his voice at me and I was left dumb-founded cause I've never seen that side of him! I was stunned, shocked, a little scared, upset etc etc. I had bad mixed feelings. I guess I really screwed up and I deserved that. :(
I'm sorry Sir! Really am sorry for what happened! I didn't realise I was being selfish! I was listening - it's just that I hated the direction of that conversation. I hate it when you think everything is against you. Hate the fact that you stop having faith in that particular thing which I have so much faith in. That thing which I wish we could be doing together cause I know we'll be happy despite those posibble arguments we joked about earlier. You know we both want it and the fact that people around us are supportive makes me happy. Having said that, I've stopped hoping. I'm just living for the moment and I'm mentally prepared for your next 'relapse'. Sigh!
Whatever it is, I'm glad being in this so-called mess again and I know it's all temporary. I know I'll be hurt again but heck it's all worth it cause you're worth it. Like it or not Sir, I am addicted to you. You said' I'm like an alcohol - it makes you happy but it's not good for you. I say, you're the honey and I'm the bee or probably a bug sometimes (bluek!) so you got to accept that fact! Honey is apparently good for our healths so .....
Again I'm sorry and hope you will get up from the right side of the bed tomorrow and be back to normal mode. Otherwise, I'll just see you on Sunday! I'm really looking forward to that cause it's gonna be my first time and you made it sound so interesting!
I'll be wearing my most revealing party dress ok! *wink*
If I don't see you on Sunday, I'll see you 20 years from now on the road and if I don't see you on the road I'll see you in my house probably preparing for my child's birthday party together with me...
That would be nice wouldn't it? *smiles*
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 12:58 AM
